Matriachal Lilith

First Posted 9 May 2009

A prominent Black Moon Lilith in the natal chart is either having a conjunction to another planet or an angular Lilith. Having a prominent Black Moon Lilith in the natal chart usually means an intense personality expressed via a strong character. Prominent Liliths are developed in personality from a young age and can sometimes indicate early developmental disruptions within our nurturing environment. The development of personality according to Developmental Psychology occurs largely between birth and seven years of age. In many cases – the Black Moon Lilith part of personality relates to a much younger inner self.


How can a child be Lilithy?

A strongly placed astrological Lilith can manifest in personality through different ways. The Object Constancy (Mahler) developmental stage for example – is where the young toddler rips one of her dolls apart while she meticulously cares for another doll. The child is expressing the good and less than good aspects of her early nurturing experiences. This behaviour is quite healthy and over time the infant integrates these black and white psychological challenges into personality. Sometimes this kind of differentiation is not completed in the development of personality and the person develops a strong character expression in order to compensate.


Perhaps developmental Lilith emerges during this early “Constancy” stage more so than any other stage of development.

When the infant cannot resolve the psychological conflict between their “good and less than good nurturing” the psyche becomes somewhat inflexible. The child can develop an impasse where life is either all rotten or all wonderful. There can be few grey areas within such black and white beliefs. Sibling rivalry and jealousy issues can also be a product of this early stage in life.

When the child endures traumatic experiences – survival can depend on the part of personality which “takes charge” of the psyche. Enter the “prominent Lilith” and the Black Moon part of personality.

In essence during such a developmental crisis there is a part of personality that splits away from the impasse in order to survive. The split off part of personality remains functional albeit hidden from the persons awareness. Invariably this part of personality can have a “louder voice” than the black and white impasse dynamic. It may also reflect the “bad” nurturing object for the child, however not in all cases. Black Moon Lilith is not all “black” in my view. She is a highly creative energy albeit, confusing.

So the young child can take on aspects of mothers or grand mothers inflexible parenting style within the psyche. Have you ever heard a four year child old utter reprimands and ultimatums like a bossy parent does? The child is mimicking his or her own experience of that restrictive parent voice. The formation of Lilith is via this kind of verbal transference however Lilith seems to form in personality during the non verbal stages of development too.

In the normal transference process in personality development, aspects of our role models personality are injuncted and introjected as parts of our own personality. The Black Moon Lilith or split off part remains remotely connected however separate to these introjected parts. Lilith emerges in personality expression unconsciously – as counter transference to this system. “She” may take the form of the very prejudiced parent that abused her. She may take on an inflexible form – resistant to anything remotely sounding like grandmas authority. Lilith is a wild fire kind of aspect in personality she takes control of chaos in a manner which is contrary to the rest of the psyche.

When Saturn is conjunct Lilith in the natal chart, the “baby” Lilith within – the infant or adolescent can sound very much like the matriarchal Lilith.


Angry Granny

Someone must keep order in the chaos

Saturn represents the authoritative and controlling part of personality. The firm parent or prejudiced parent become a part of the  intra psychic dynamics. Saturn allows a framework for managing ones inner psychic structures in relation to the environment. Saturn is not always such a bleak part of personality however when Saturn and Lilith are together in the chart ones unconscious and “darker” sides can develop a mean Matriarchal streak.

Saturn and Lilith seek out ways to have control. The matriarch requires her young charges to experience her own sense of authority. In real life the Saturn-Lilith person can be a carer of disabled or aged people. The Saturn Lilith person may need to form a dependant relationship with a victim like person. One must appreciate that Saturn/Lilith is not wholly the carer in relationships however an abuser within that relationship too.

The Saturn Lilith can provide a form of structure and chaos.

1. Internal self psychological structure in the case of the early impasse – the persons un integrated developmental issues are kept in check by via Lilith and Saturn’s authority over internal and external systems. The person wears themselves out daily by organising and being in control. The person can develop prejudiced beliefs and blames others for problems.

2. Counter Transference in relationships where – even though a person is the carer and in charge of another persons chaos, the Saturn Lilith part of the carer’s personality is potentially abusive. The Matriarch becomes frustrated and angry enough to find corrupt outlets to express a darker self. Here the unresolved impasse during the object constancy stage is unleashed.

The Matriarchal Lilith can be a complicated process of maintaining dignity in contrast to an abusive counter transference process.


The Saturn – Lilith type of abuser encompasses a captive style of relationship. After abusing the dependant person in a surreptitious manner the Saturn Lilith person will then do something nice for the abused person. The dependant person rationalizes the abusers behaviour for their own survival needs. With a similar profile as the Stockholm Syndrome the Saturn Lilith person needs to have a captive or dependant person to manage and express their deeply embedded psychological impasse from earlier in life.

Some Saturn Lilith People

Kevin Costner                                                        Cecil Beaton

Neil Diamond                                                         Bruce Lee

Chris Evert                                                              Gregory Peck

Dean Martin                                                            Steve Earle

Salvador Dali

Interesting enough the South Australian – Royal Automobile Association shows Saturn/Lilith at the Mid heaven. (Data by Solar Fire) The RAA operates a service to help stranded motorists who have broken down. In this case it seems that Saturn and Lilith plays an intrinsic role in their public service.




15 Responses to “Matriachal Lilith”

  1. 1 kingsley September 16, 2011 at 19:32

    I dont know why comments are not showing up here?

  2. 2 astromama01 October 16, 2011 at 03:35


    I have BML (LIBRA) rising AND saturn/jupiter/ASC conjunction.

    BML squ. my MC & Ceres (Cancer).

    orbs are 1-6 degrees.

    Can you please explain there aspects? Thank you

    • 3 kingsley October 24, 2011 at 09:10

      Hello Astromama, BML rising will afford you with a certain amount of charisma. It may be a certain affliction in your speech, looks or voice. If BML is close to Jupiter Saturn on your ascendant then your expression will will have an almost attractive quality with an ability for discenment. Even if you are a little forthright or “blunt” in situations you will get to the point. Juiter and Saturn on the asc can also relate to inconsistencies between optimism and pessimism, being open or closed to life’s experiences. Justice and balance is an important part of your world and Lilith will have an effect on how you express your experience these attributes. There is a kind of duality where Lilith might get a “foot in the door” for better or worse. The trick is to creatively express these elements of personality so that balance can be achieved.


  3. 4 lilliput October 23, 2011 at 15:17

    Hi Kingsly

    What a magnificent blog!

    I just wanted to ask you how I can know if I have a prominent Lillith or Vesta. I’ve done the chart on astro but there are no lines from either? In the info adjacent I have a square to Chiron for Lillith in my 11th house of capricorn. And I have two circles joined by a line on a diagonal to Chiron for Vesta in the 7th house of Libra.

    I’m sorry if its a confusing comment but I am confused!

  4. 5 kingsley October 24, 2011 at 09:13

    If either Lilith or Vesta is angular or conjunct another planet or point is usually the way you can tell if Lilith has an emphassis. Get someone to make a chart on a a reputable astrology program so you know exactly where the points are. Sens me your birth details and I will tell you.


  5. 6 lilliput October 28, 2011 at 14:20

    Hi Kingsly

    I was born 20/01/74 at 8:30am in Hadera, Israel.

    Thanks for the reply, my initial comment didn’t show up so I thought you didn’t receive it.


  6. 7 kingsley October 28, 2011 at 17:54

    Hello Lillliput

    Your Black Moon Lilith (True) is at 12 degrees 50 of Capricorn. I would say this Lilith has a reasonable emphasis. I know its about 5 degrees from your Moon in the 11th house but because PLuto and Mars also aspect the Moon, Lilith will have an effect in that mixture. It would seem to be all about the Moon. Vesta does not have an empasis at all.


  7. 8 lilliput October 29, 2011 at 05:08

    Thanks Kingsley, I guess that’s why I relate to this post. How do people work with the Lillith to achieve healing or integration?

  8. 9 kingsley October 29, 2011 at 19:14

    Hello Lilliput, that is the 64 thousand dollar question. Basically the answer to your question is developing Mentalization processes, Reflexivity, delving into and making sense of Intersubjective spaces and developing working relationships with Lilith.

    Its a big question that you ask Lilliput but over time its possible to claim back parts of personality or express them or put them to highly creative uses.

    Some people are already “doing it” and they do not know it although, perhaps they sense they have a certain affect on people. The trick is not to repress Lilith or to continue any destructive patterns and instead, embrace “her”, talk to her, let her “speak” and practice regulation when she needs containment.


  9. 10 lilliput October 30, 2011 at 04:53

    Thanks so much Kingsley for your reply.

    When will you blog again? As a psychotherapy student – I really relate to your words.

  10. 11 kingsley October 30, 2011 at 10:01

    Feel free to join me over at Astrology by Kingsley on Facebook Lilliput. Not everyone has facebook, however its a “fan page thing and I dont think one has to be logged into a facebook account to view my writings there.!/pages/Astrology-By-Kingsley/340221454655

    best regards

  11. 12 maggi November 15, 2011 at 17:39

    oh it seems i have found you at just the right time.. everything you say here is touching me and speaking in very loud words.. apart from the million dollar question i am working on integration right now and had a passive, dominant mother, with a history of trauma.. would you look at my chart and for me and how can i let you see it? thank you maggi x

  12. 13 kingsley November 15, 2011 at 18:43

    Hello Maggi, you may email me your details if you wish.

    If you want to do a reading have a look in the “services” button at the top of my page. I have been under the weather recently with some of lifes problems but I am back doing charts again now.


  13. 14 maggi November 16, 2011 at 04:19

    Hi K, Sorry to hear you have been under the weather…and ty for your reply.. i will email you my chart.. ty, i just wished for you to comment about this aspect~ black moon lillith.. on my chart or not..
    i do intuitive readings via spirit if you wish something in return?? maggi :O) x

  14. 15 kingsley November 16, 2011 at 09:51

    Hello Maggi, you have Moon conjunct Black Moon Lilith in Aries placed on the descendant angle withing range of the south node.

    The Moon is also trine Saturn and square your ascendant ruler Venus. When assessing the Black Moon Lilith one would need to look at the Moon relationship to other planets as well as the nodal axis to interpret reasons for the souls journey and where that integration will emerge into ones life.

    Your relationship to the Moon and Mother is a close one being on the descendant, however saying that the Moon is at its furtherest point in the orbit around the earth. There are ways in which your attachment to mother and ways to fulfill your needs in life have followed certain patterns in your life. These patterns are difficult to understand when in real time your experiences seem to affected by others. Its important to assess how ones own need for certain involvements and attachments play out while actually living in them (experiencing them).

    I hear that you are conscious and looking towards some kind of integration in your life. The Moon and BML in the relationship sector and trine to Saturn might say something about Grandparents or your own mothers traditional kind of parenting versus her own relationship styles. You may have complied over time to say less about your needs and feelings because this suited a greater need for closeness to significant others. It is within these kinds of processes that Black Moon Lilith developed a way for survival and instead of “her” accepting the kind of banishments and repressions for natural expressions she finds a way to project her expression through others. Relationships take on difficult push and pull kind of influences.

    The creative and destructive elements of Lilith are therefore contained in dealing with other people and at times it would be necessary to assess a measure of transference from past lives and developmental times in order for the creative-genius element to work at its best.

    I hope this is something to go ahead with regarding your integration at the current time. These things take some time to sort through and to become conscious of. Its best to edge bit by bit towards this goal rather than big steps and depending on the level of work you have already attained the whole process is quite worthwhile in the end.

    Best regards

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